do a self-compassion exercise
I have a hard time writing this post today because there are way too many things I want to say.
Let me start by a quote by Dr Kristin Neff, a researcher who dedicates her life to self-compassion.
“Rather than wandering around in problem-solving mode all day, thinking mainly of what you want to fix about yourself or your life, you can pause for a few moments throughout the day to marvel at what’s not broken. You”
This quote reflects exactly what I needed to do yesterday.
As you know, the self-care journey is coming to an end, I’m dealing with way too many projects at the same time and I want to redefine my priorities (see self-care act #346 for a quick refresh).
But I don’t have enough emotional and physical energy to make good decisions.
So the best thing I thought about was to do a self-compassion exercise. Instead of being in “problem-solving mode”, I would just be. And be happy about it.
A way to charge my batteries, to practice kindness, understanding and empathy towards myself.
But there is a problem.
I understand the importance of self-compassion.
I understand that I cannot take care of myself if I’m not compassionate towards myself, if I don’t look at myself with empathy and kindness.
I also understand that life is much easier with self-compassion: perfection is an illusion, “failures” become learning experiences, self-criticism is counterproductive…
Still, my self-compassion skills are very poor.
I’m always pushing myself too hard, accepting nothing but results that are anyways rarely satisfying enough. I need to be on top of the game all the time.
So I read a few chapters and practiced one exercise yesterday. I don’t think I picked the right one but the reading was very interesting.
Today, I found exercises that resonated more in me.
Now, I want to practice to get better at it and be more empathic towards myself.
On other words, I want to get on top of the game at self-compassion.
Just kidding 😀
WHY IS IT SELF-CARE? With self-compassion, we give ourselves the same kindness and care we’d give to a good friend. Kristin Neff
MORE ABOUT THIS
Dr Kristen Neff, a Phd who’s devoting her research to self-compassion, has a website with a few practical exercises. Check them here
Yesterday, I practiced using one of her books, which has much more exercises than her website.
The book is documented with figures and research to show how self-compassion enhance your quality of life and that of your relationships.
A must read if you want to dig further.